20/20

24 Aug 12

I'm considered to be 20 weeks and 0 days pregnant, and predicted to have another 20 weeks and 0 days to go.  The due date is an awful stream of numbers, 01/11/13, the Chinese zodiac is the water dragon, and the sex will remain unknown throughout the pregnancy.  Much to my relief, I'm convinced that water dragons are the best, and therefore refuse to arrive on unacceptable due dates.

I've been meaning to take pictures of my rapidly expanding body with the idea that some day I will return to a normal shape.  The trouble with this plan is that asking someone to take pictures of your fat body is not very fun.  But here we are at the halfway point, and the neatness of the numbers 20/20 alone has inspired me to begin documenting.  If you would rather not watch my belly grow, then get off my blog and look at all those ultrasounds and ugly baby pictures on facebook.  These are my memoirs, and I shall do as I wish.

31 Aug 12 (21)

The bugger was about 10 ounces and the length of standard pair of hair cutting shears (7") this week.

(All estimates based on information from http://www.whattoexpect.com/.)

07 Sep 12 (22)

Heavy Pants got up to a pound, and grew to the length of a Sierra Nevada bottle (7.5").

14 Sep 12 (23)

Paperback (8") managed to put on .2 pounds.  Mama put that on times ten.

21 Sep 12 (24)

The kickboxer competed in the 1.5 lbs weight class and grew to the width of printer paper (8.5").

28 Sep 12 (25)

Little pancake grew to the length of Mama's foot (9"), but needed more syrup to reach two pounds.

(My dad says my feet are like pancakes.)

05 Oct 12 (26)

Flapjack short stack made it to two full pounds.

12 Oct 12 (27)

We're now into the third trimester, where length is measured from head to toe instead of head to rump.

MacBook Pro (15") doubled in weight this last month.

19 Oct 12 (28)

The little meathead could fit between wall studs (16") and weighed 10 quarter pounders.

26 Oct 12 (29)

Baby giraffe matched my height in August of '82 (17"), but weighed in short of 3 pounds.

(This means it's time to put on some serious weight.  Babies have a responsibility to be cute if they expect to be cared for.)

13 Oct 12 (27) Bonus