Worst Mommy

In general, I think I'm a pretty good mommy.  I feed our little bugger any time he asks, hold him, talk to him, change him, take him on walks, protect him from the elements, and give him too many kisses.  But last night, for about half an hour, I was the worst mommy.
George was on an overnight shift, and Drakeson fell asleep around 20:00.  Had George been home, he would have convinced me to go to sleep immediately, but on my own, I took advantage of the opportunity and called an old friend I had been meaning to catch up with.  We had been talking for about two hours when Drakeson started stirring.  I got off the phone to take care of him, but he had already fallen back asleep.  As I brushed my teeth, I convinced myself that I should change his diaper since it had been a couple hours.  And since changing his diaper would wake him up anyway, I decided to feed him first so he would have a nice, full belly.  There is nothing Drakeson loves more than milk, so in a tired daze, he ate.  And he ate and he ate.  I was looking down and admiring my happy little angel when he startled us both by hurling milk all over the bed.  Now he was fully awake in a cold, wet nightie with vomit in his mouth and a dirty diaper on his ass.  I scooped him up and went into his room to pick out clean clothes, which gave him enough time to panic and get congested.  Because he was congested, he couldn't breathe unless he was screaming, so I put him down and cleaned out his nose with saline solution and a suction bulb.  Nobody likes being on either end of that process.  I changed his diaper, which made him cold.  I took off his wet nightie, which made him colder.  So imagine you were fast asleep when some giant person force-fed you until you threw up, put salt water up your nose, and took off all your clothes as you shivered.  That person would be the worst mommy.
After his new nightie was on, I wanted to bounce him on the exercise ball, which always calms him down.  Strangely enough, it wasn't in our room.  I put Drakeson down and ran out to the living area.  Drakeson screamed (and rightly so), for now on top of everything else, he had been abandoned.  The ball wasn't there, so I came back in the bedroom and looked again, to no avail.  After a few minutes of running around, I realized George had stolen it, locked it in the garage, and convinced me to turn on the house alarm.  So I ran back out, messed with the stupid alarm, and finally got the ball back into our room.  Drakeson and I were both totally pissed.

Earlier that Day (24 Feb 13)

Generous

When George and I started planning for our dragon baby, we didn't think about presents.  During the pregnancy, I bought Drakeson a pumpkin hat and a package of white socks.  Little did we know, I could have held off.  At one month in, we've written no fewer than 45 thank-you notes, most of which address multiple gifts.  Add a few sources of hand-me-downs in perfect condition, and we've easily accumulated thousands of dollars of spectacular baby gear: clothing, dishes, electronics, towels, toys, etc.  And let's not leave out the food and visits we've had the pleasure to receive.  We've given away an extra tummy time gym, and sling carrier, and exersaucer because we had duplicates.  We have a (new) hamper that's filled with blankets that won't fit in our extra blanket drawer.  In fact, we've been receiving gift cards due to the fact that we have everything.
Then my friend (Drakeson's girlfriend) and her husband came to visit from France.  Of course, she had brought about ten onesies, a hat, mittens, booties, and two stuffed dragons for her boyfriend.  She and I have known each other for the past 25 years.  After a couple of days in our house, she asked me why I don't have a rocking chair.  As it turns out, Drakeson already liked being bounced on the exercise ball, rocked in his vibrating chair, and swung in his electric swing.  I wasn't sure we needed another piece of furniture just to move him around.  Gliders are wonderful to use, but they're big and bulky.  Rocking chairs are pretty, but don't look very comfortable.  There was only one rocker I was interested in, but I could get a nice glider for half the price, so I didn't commit to it.  I was thinking about letting Drakeson's girlfriend talk me into buying it, when she and her husband did a crazy thing - they bought it behind my back.  With the matching ottoman.
George and I are overwhelmed by everyone's generosity.  With how spoiled Drakeson is, you would think only a few special humans started out as babies.  So to everyone in our lives, whether you have sent a card, dropped by for a visit, or bought us a rocking chair, thank you for your interest in our little Drakeson.  And don't worry; we won't expect a thing for our second baby.  We already have everything anyway.

Best Smile

There was a man at the church I play for who had the best smile.  He and his wife were two of a small number of regulars who came every Sunday.  On Monday, during a triple bypass surgery, he died.

The man's wife requested that I play one of his favorites, Mark Hayes' arrangement of "I'll Fly Away" by Albert Brumley, during his funeral this morning.  Sundays will never be the same.

George Drakeson Miner

I just created a new blog for my son.
The link is: http://drakesonandmillicent.blogspot.com/

Birthing

I took a 5-week hypnobirthing class and typed up all my notes like a dork. I read "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth," including 125 inspiring pages of successful birthing stories. I watched documentaries like "Orgasmic Birth" and "The Business of Being Born" in highly emotional states. I practiced my meditations, did breathing exercises, walked, swam, did squats, and dutifully followed a schedule of uncomfortable perineum massages. Despite loving my pregnancy, I couldn't wait to go into labor.

On January 11th, the due date, I went in for a doctor's appointment.  It was recommended that I return on the 15th, schedule an induction preparation appointment on the 17th, and follow through with the induction on the 18th. I had surrounded myself with materials suggesting that I did not, in fact, need to be medically induced one week after my estimated due date, so I cancelled all those appointments and scheduled an acupuncture session on the 17th instead. Meanwhile, I did just about everything people do that may or may not help "naturally induce" labor. Aside from the acupuncture, I took long walks, ate eggplant and spicy foods, tried a breast pump a couple times a day, took evening primrose oil capsules, drank raspberry leaf tea, and talked to the little one in an encouraging manner.

The baby was extremely active during the acupuncture session on Thursday afternoon. I came home feeling relaxed and hopeful, taking note of occasional contractions throughout the rest of the evening. By the time we were trying to go to bed, I had contractions every 10 minutes throughout the entire night. I kept waiting for them to get closer together, but they didn't. During the day on Friday, I had a very light appetite and went through irregular but strong contractions. I lost my mucous plug in the morning, and we spent the rest of the day hiking through McKinney Falls State Park, walking through Costco and Whole Foods, and settling down for the evening with the BBC tv show "Call the Midwife." I probably should have tried to eat and drink more, but it was a very comfortable day of labor. As we went to bed on Friday night, contractions resumed every 10 minutes with more intensity. I wanted to stay home until my contractions were much closer together, but suddenly I noticed a lot of blood and got worried. We left the house at exactly 12:34 am and were admitted by the hospital at 1:30 in the morning. They said my cervix was 5 centimeters dilated.

I continued dilating quite well throughout the morning. My doctor checked me around 7:00, and I had progressed to 8 centimeters.  They broke my water. Everything looked promising, and by 8:30, I was at 9.5 centimeters. I was told that in just another .5, I could start pushing. And there we were, stuck at 9.5 centimeters. I was offered pitocin twice, and declined. I briefly tried different positions, but only continued to bleed and contract. My cervix was not budging, and I started getting delirious. I had been laboring since Thursday night around 23:00, and it was now 11:30 on Saturday morning. The nurses would come in and talk to me in between contractions but I was too dazed and asleep to understand them. George started getting worried and whispered sweet things in my ear. I was finally starting to get discouraged with the labor. My doctor suggested that my uterus was too tired and recommended the pitocin once more. I agreed, seeing how the last 3 hours had yielded nothing.

They told me I wasn't allowed to push, but the pitocin transformed my contractions into pushing fits every two minutes. Not knowing what to do, I was nearly in tears. An hour and a half later at 13:00, I accepted an epidural, which seemed like the correct decision at that point. Now, I will say that I would have rather delivered this baby without pitocin or an epidural. However, having had the epidural, I would also like to say it is a fabulous drug. I would love to engage in another on a rainy afternoon.

After the epidural kicked in, they upped my pitocin. My contractions were one minute apart, and the strength of them was way off the charts. My cervix wouldn't finish dilating the last .5 centimeter for another two hours. I couldn't believe it. While my contractions were exploding, I was able to spend some good quality time with George and Mom. We just chatted and laughed. I was told to take a nap, but I was so relaxed, it wasn't really necessary. I'm sure I dozed in and out for those two hours, but my mom says I wouldn't stop talking. I started pushing around 15:30, and it was a very special hour. I was extremely relaxed and happy, excited to do a good job. My mom was holding my left leg and George was holding my right as our very healthy, strong son emerged at 16:48.

At this time, we noticed a very large bump on the side of his head. As it turned out, his head hadn't been positioned at the ideal angle, which is what probably stalled the labor in the first place.  In some ways, I can't help feeling like I cheated myself out of my own desires. I pushed with my contractions, but by will instead of instinct. I didn't feel the ring of fire. I didn't push in any of the positions I had envisioned, but in a position that was ideal for the monitor. I had no idea when the placenta came through. I was just relaxed and giggling my way through the end of a 40-hour labor. There was no sense of physical relief when the head emerged, but there was joy. I loved my son from the moment he was conceived, and he made it into my arms as a very healthy baby.

Alphabet Book

On December 8th, George and I held the L&G Alphabet Party with the purpose of creating this present for our baby's 0th birthday.  We had a fantastic time with our guests, who shared piano, harmonium, violin, trumpet, guitar, autoharp, and vocal music into the later hours of the party.  Our jam session was interrupted by about 25 tone-deaf carollers ringing our doorbell, which couldn't have been a more perfect close to the evening.

Many thanks to all the participants and artists of our Alphabet Book!

Ripley Healy

Jessica Morgan

Doris Whiteside

Jenny Reynolds & Kerry Polk

Matthew Healy

Linda Miner

Brian Mowrey

Tiffany Nappier

Malinda Healy

Nathan Cook

Celeste Coburn

Livia Shen

Michelle Healy

Nalinda Charnsangavej

Rose Dragoo

Ripley Healy

Malissa Mollberg

Barbara Bresette-Mills

Sherry Healy

Tiffany Nappier

Zachary Miner

Matthew Healy

Jessica Morgan

Lynn Campbell

Simone Ducloux

Matthew Healy

30/10

This is a sequel to 20/20, a previous post that has been tracking the growth of my pregnant belly.  We're 30 weeks down now, with an estimated 10 to go.  We're guessing it will be a girl.
Although the medical community predicts Jan 11th, George and I chose our own due dates with no good reasoning involved.  I decided on January 6th, and George chose December 25th.  This means that if the baby comes on Dec 31st, we're tied.  Any day after that, and I win our bet.  If I lose, I have to watch the 2005-2012 batman trilogy at home with George (see the dark wife rises).  If I win, however, George has to find a sitter and take me to the live show of Igudesman and Joo, which is playing here in Austin on January 21st.  Of course, for all we know, we'll be giving kisses to a sweet little boy in a sterile hospital room that day.  [Editor's note: this is exactly what happened.]

02 Nov 12 (30)
There wasn't much progress in weight or height this week because baby Einstein was too busy putting grooves on what used to be a smooth brain.  Gross.

09 Nov 12 (31)
McKenna weighed in at over 3 pounds and reached the height of one of those creepy overpriced American girl dolls (18").  McKenna is the American girl doll of the year, whatever that means.

16 Nov 12 (32)
Little Pilgrim could have grown to the width of our Thanksgiving placemats (19"), and will have an amniotic Thanksgiving Special on Thursday.  Pre-holiday, pilgrim was nearing 4 pounds.

23 Nov 12 (33)
Over 30 years ago, I was born at 17", weighing over 4.5 pounds.  Little Lan weighed the same this week, and measured anywhere between my baby height and 19".

30 Nov 12 (34)
Our breech baby grew to the height of a standard pillowcase (20"), and weighed about 5 pounds.

07 Dec 12 (35)
Height limit has nearly been reached at this point, but the bugger weighed in at 5.5 pounds.

14 Dec 12 (36)
The Little Worst weighed in at 6 pounds, and we all know what 6 squared is.

21 Dec 12 (37)
We've graduated from the land of preemies.  Bigwig Full Term weighed about 6.5 lbs.

28 Dec 12 (38)
We're ready to go any day now at about 7 pounds.

04 Jan 12 (39)
We're at week 39 with absolutely no signs of labor.  Lazy Bones was probably between 7 and 7.5 lbs.

11 Jan 12 (40)
Officially due, Baby should have settled in at around 7.5 lbs and 19-21 inches.

18 Jan 12 (41)
Overdue got all the prompting we could handle.
He came out the next day at 6 pounds, 7 ounces, and 19.5 inches.

13 Dec 12 (36) Bonus

40 Weeks and 2 Days Photoshoot

Drakeson was due January 11, 2013.  We thought we'd try to get pictures of the family with a newborn two days later, but that's not how it worked out.  This was our first time meeting photographer Angela Lind.